All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
