If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
