I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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