I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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