Sponge bath it is.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
