small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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