So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
