That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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