After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Randomize
