and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
