somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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