I love black thongs
another moral hangover. fuck.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize