My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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