And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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