theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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