The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
