She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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