Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
