That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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