i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
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