I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
