just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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