So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
