I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize