My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
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