can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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