Kiss
Puke
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
