Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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