Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
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