I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
