ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
