You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
