then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
