I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
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Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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