it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Your cock deserves a montage
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.