if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Stone age, man.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.