hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
