There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
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If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
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One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me