Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
