maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
