Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Randomize
