Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize