I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
