I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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