They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
