Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
