please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
