Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
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