I smell stomach acid.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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