this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
