I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize