see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
